People Problems Made Easy Series Part 4 or 6
How to solve problems at work
Assumptions and How to Identify Them?
Assumptions can be the root of all people problems, in my personal experience. I had no idea I was making so many. I still continue to make them every day, just now I am aware that this is only from my perspective and when a conversation doesn’t ‘feel’ like it is working I think, “Ah! what assumptions have I made here?”
Then I ask a few more questions.
We can often be asked by others to fix problems other people have such as:
- Can you get my team to listen to each other?
- Can you get my teen to clean their room and take more pride in themselves?
The assumption in these examples is that the other person wants to listen and the teen wants tidy their room.
The person who has the problem, (in the examples above the business owner or parent) has assumed that they know what needs to happen to make things right and usually without any in depth conversation with the other person involved.
And for some this might be true, in fact is it very likely for the parent they have noticed when they feel good when staying on top of the housework, or the business owner has noticed recently that he does not listen and realises if he had, things would have been better.
The assumption is that others work the same as you. This is often when you buy solutions before really knowing if they have the same problem as you or even want the same solution as you would.
The reality is that this investment of time and money will most likely be wasted unless that person has said:
“Can you get me some help. I want to listen more?
“Mum, I know I need to clean my room, I know I need to have more self pride but I don’t know why I don’t do it and I would like help”
Who has the problem really?
The person asking us to help is really saying:
“I want my team to listen more”
“I want my teen to clean their room and take more self pride”
Invariably when we ask more questions the problem may manifest as lack of listening or lack of delegation or lack of self pride but the solution for each person is nearly always very unqiue.
The way to tackle this it to ask the other person:
What is working for them and what is not working and what they would like to have happen?
How to solve problems in work
When a boss says I would like them to listen more and they ask the team member, “What would you like to have happen?”
Team member says, “I do listen and what I want is for you to listen to me.”
Then what happens?
How to solve problems with your teen
Mum asks teenager what would you like to have happen?
Teen says, “I would like you to get off my case and let me have my room just the way I would like to have it.”
Then what happens?
In reality many people avoid asking this question because they don’t know if they can handle the response.
And unless you create the right environment not everyone will tell you what you ‘need’ to hear, they will tell you what they think you ‘want’ to hear.
Then what happens?
The problem is not clear and the solution is often miles away.
Of course, this is all assumption on my part. I am giving you examples of what I have seen and heard but of course you will be different I am sure.
It is only by asking some questions you can begin to clarify what is fact and what is assumption on your part.
This is why the Power Group Model has been so innovative, it creates a space for you to solve problems and make decisions. Whilst you hear how differently people answer the same questions. How differently people solve similar problems and the great thing is you don’t have to guess anymore, you simply ask questions to understand.
Want to experience the questions in a group and learn how other people think, book our monthly introductory call now.
After our free 30 minute session you will leave with either:
- Your problem solved
- Your next best step planned
- Knowledge whether Step by Step Listening is part of the solution or not
You could of course leave with all three.
Call us now +44 329 286648 to book your 30 minute now or for those not local email firstname.lastname@example.org and let’s arrange a free skype call.
Thank you for listening, I am waiting to hear from you.
Sheryl Andrews Founder and Power Group Facilitator
“People Problems Made Easy,” I suspect you have some kind of people problem, otherwise in your busy life why would you stop to read this article. If you would like to know more we have more articles. Part 1 in this series talks about ‘The Problem No One Will Talk About’ and Part 2 talks about, ‘How to understand what they mean?’ Part 3 Why talking about the problem doesn’t always work