Why Talking About The Problem Doesn’t Always Help-People’s Problems Made Easy Part 3 fo 6

People Problems Made Easy Series Part 3 or 6

How to solve problems at work

Why Talking About The Problem Doesn’t Always Help

One of the biggest time wasters we see everyday is people investing lots of time and sometimes money talking to other people about the problem.

How do you solve problems?


  • Do you talk about the problem over and over again hoping to gain some insight?
  • Do you tell others and then ask what do you think?
  • Do you talk to everyone and anyone about the problem except the person it involves?
  • Do you keep it bottled up not sure if you should complain?


Then what happens?

In our experience sometimes a spark of inspiration appears when a pearl of wisdom is aired. You gain insights into the different view point you did not have before.

Then when you go to take action based on that advise something stops you.

Or you end up spiralling down, you get even more annoyed, frustrated and can feel a sense of being trapped or stuck with the problem.

Depending who you ask, most friends and even consultants will listen and in someway agree that you are right to be cross, they might even give suggestions and you may have a conversation like:

Yes I tried that

No they won’t like that

Or I can’t do that

Thanks I don’t mean to be unhelpful but that won’t work.

The fundamental thing to consider changing is stop talking about the problem and start investing that time talking about the possible solution. The challenge is often to do with ‘the problem’ is familiar and you know it well, so you can talk about it with confidence.

Changing your focus and talking about the solution can feel a little uncomfortable, new territory and can stretch your thinking. However, when you talk about the possible solution and it comes from within you and your existing knowledge, it is likely to be a solution you can implement.

Next time you are catch yourself ‘moaning’ about a problem to someone else remember one important question. You can either ask them to ask you the following or you can simply ask yourself:

What would I like to have happen?

Try talking about what you want. Explore that with as much time and energy as you do ‘the problem’ and notice what happens next.

Please do share below, we love to listen.

At Step by Step Listening we pride ourselves in being able to ask powerful questions that change your focus and therefore change the results you are getting right now.

Perhaps you asked yourself the question; What you would like to have happen? And the response is you want someone else to do something different. Well, maybe it is time to ask them, what they would like to have happen.

Still feeling stuck, know that makes sense and don’t understand why you can’t take action, call us now.

Our Guarantee

After our free 30 minute session you will leave with either:

  1. Your problem solved
  2. Your next best step planned
  3. Knowledge whether Step by Step Listening is part of the solution or not

You could of course leave with all three.

Call us now +44 329 286648 to book your 30 minute now or for those not local email enquiries@stepbysteplistening.com and let’s arrange a free skype call.

Thank you for listening, I am waiting to hear from you.

how to solve problems at work





Sheryl Andrews Founder and Power Group Facilitator

“People Problems Made Easy,” I suspect you have some kind of people problem, otherwise in your busy life why would you stop to read this article. If you would like to know more we have more articles.  Part 1 in this series talks about ‘The Problem No One Will Talk About’ and Part 2 talks about, ‘How to understand what they mean?’


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