People Problems Made Easy Series Part 6 or 6
How to solve problems at work
The rules that prevent good communication
One of the most interesting things I discovered when I first started working with clean language, as a client and during my training as a facilitator, was the amount of little rules I have about what is right or wrong, what this means and what that means.
One of the reasons I created the group experience and developed the power group discussion model was because I also found myself dumbfounded when I discovered others have different rules to me, from what a particular facial expression means, to a particular word or phrase.
Having now worked with parents, teachers, trainers and many business owners I now know that so many of us interpret information differently and it is constantly changing.
No wonder communication is so challenging.
All good reasons to ask more questions to clarify and avoid assumption.
Imagine a business owner working on increasing productivity. What kind of productivity is that productivity?
How do you know productivity?
In my experience it is a constantly moving measure. It is not static and it has to adapt however I am not sure our meaning of the word in conversation adapts quite as quickly which is why it is good to check you are both talking about the same measure ‘today’.
Now this article is not about the word productivity or its meaning, it is about recognising the meaning of all kinds of words and phrases that you have and how others may qualify them differently.
Another one I can share is ‘eye contact’ or ‘lack of eye contact’ and what that means. There are quite literally so many variances that affect what it means when someone is maintaining eye contact or not. But so many assume they are engaging and listening if they maintain eye contact and they are not interested or bored or not paying attention if they lose eye contact.
That begs the questions what is eye contact? What determines eye contact?
Do they stare constantly? Can they look away briefly and if so how long before it is deemed lack of eye contact?
Communication and people are complicated because the parameters are constantly changing. That is why for a business experiencing growth and even parents of teens, the communication channels being open and clear are so vital.
I wonder what do you consider to be clear and open communication channels, please do share below your own perception and let’s see how many different versions there are.
The first step in all good communication, I believe, is be very clear about your own language, understand what you mean first and foremost. Then you can at least share accurately with others.
The next step is to embark on asking more questions and reduce assumptions in order to understand other people.
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Thanks for listening
Sheryl Andrews Founder and Power Group Facilitator