In my opinion it is pointless to keep them separate, in fact it is virtually impossible.
It is not like they are 2 completely different worlds?
Or are they for you? Are you completely different at home to how you are at work?
For years I was like this until I understood myself well enough to be myself in all environments.
We are one person and who we are at home is part of who we are at work and vice versa.
I agree that we have our professional fronts and we can limit what personal stuff we take to work, how long we talk about it and what specifics we discuss.
I also know that for many not thinking about home life and focusing 100% on work can be a coping mechanism. I know when my mum was dying I did not tell anyone apart from my line manager. That way if I looked sad or tired they didn’t give me sympathy, I didn’t want sympathy I needed work as a distraction.
However this whole ethos of keeping home and work separate is in my opinion a complete waste of valuable resource. Unless it is of benefit to the individual of course.
That whole process of not telling anyone about my mum was so that I could focus on what I could control. I could not control that she was going to die. But what happened is it made more determined and able to manage my time. I didn’t volunteer for extra hours, I spent every extra hour I had at the hospital. I asked for help and I said no to people I might have, under different circumstance said yes to.
So let’s consider for a moment if I were to explore what was happening and how I was managing all that surely that would be a great resource to manage myself and work at my best.
In fact this experience is always a great reminder to me to stop working at a pre-determined time knowing there will always be more time tomorrow. Learning from this combined personal and work experience where I was probably the most productive period of my career at the time.
Followed closely by my most unproductive period. After Mum died I threw myself into work and found myself working ridiculous hours and eventually I reached burn out and left the job completely. Doing everything completely opposite to the period before. Saying yes all the time, never knowing when to stop. All coping mechanisms to fill the gap and the loss I felt because she had gone.
Are you working, learning and living at your best?
Consider a time in your life when you made a great decision?
or managed your time really well?
or you were organised?
or you said no to others?
Imagine if you could fully understand what was happening and repeat it in every area of your life, then what happens?
Recognise your learning
What do you know NOW as a result of reading this, that perhaps you did not know before?
What difference does knowing that make, if any?
Plan your next best step
What would you like to have happen next?
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Thank you for listening